Monday, December 31, 2012

Hottie of the Day - Lina Posada

Lina Posada is a Colombian model who recently did a sexy photo shoot and video for Besame lingerie. We have the Exclusive!







10 Hours of Kate Upton's Bouncing Boobs

Blog Favorite and 2012 Ramblings of a Semi-Madman Cover Girl (Cuz if we had a publication, we would put her on the cover) Kate Upton has graced the posts of this blog over 20 times this year! So it is only fitting that we end the year with a 10 hour video of Kate Upton and her Bouncing Boobs!  Yes, some lonely guy scavenged the internet to find all of the video clips of the lovely, busty blonde and the dude made a 10 hour tribute video of Kate Upton and her Bouncing Boobs.  Well Done!  For those of you who are home, watching Ryan "Douchebag" Seacrest do his Dick Clark Impersonation, take a few minutes or hours out of your lonely New Year's Eve Celebration and watch a little Kate!  Happy New Years!

   

Hottie of the Day - Olivia Paige


Our Hottie of the Day is Blonde Bombshell, Olivia Paige.  Olivia was Playboy's Miss September of 2010.  She had just turned 18 when she was named Miss September.  Since when do 18 year olds look like that?   WOW!  Here are some more pics of the Beautiful Miss Paige.  Enjoy!






And Don't forget to check out our Other Hotties of the Day!

2012: This Year in Unnecessary Censorship

Via Jimmy Kimmel

Best News Bloopers of 2012

Another Great Year-End Compilation.  This time, the Best News Bloopers of 2012:

People are Awesome

Another cool Compilation video. This one is the 2012-2013 People are Awesome Win Compilation...

Sunday, December 30, 2012

I Need a Swimming Instructor


Is there anyway I can get her to teach me how to better my Backstroke?

Did You Just Look at my Chest?

From eBaum's World,

Hottie of the Day - Heather Knox

Heather Knox was Playboy's Miss January of 22.  Let's honor her one year anniversary of Playmate-dom with making her our "Hottie of the Day."  The beautiful blonde is still modeling and looking Hot as ever.  Her only faux-paus was admitting that she wanted to date Tim Tebow!  Come on Heather, go for a real man like one of us here at the blog!  





And Don't forget to check out our Other Hotties of the Day!

My Buddies Christmas Present to His Girlfriend

They had been dating for almost 4 years.  Notice, I used the word HAD.  She dumped him Christmas Night.  Guess he should have gone with the ring.

Damn, It's Cold!


This morning I agreed to go on a run with my neighbor.  We are both trying to get into shape and I definitely need the exercise.  We decided to run around the biking trails of West Des Moines.

After only about a mile of running, I was wanting to turn back.  Although my hangover was subsiding, I was freezing my dick off!  Literally!!!  I don't mean to be rude or use a play on words, but my dick was really freezing. I started thinking about how I have spent my whole life trying to get my dick into warm (and usually wet) places and now I am out running on a Saturday morning and my dick may render itself useless for the rest of my life due to frostbite!  What if they have to remove it!!!!  OMG!!!

Now for you warm climate dudes and women reading this, let me explain what happens when that part of the male anatomy gets really, really, really cold.  Of course it shrivels up and your balls retract into your body, seeking warmth.  That alone can be uncomfortable.  You also loose your concentration.  You cannot concentrate on anything other than trying to figure out a way to get your genitals warmed up.  It becomes an obsession.  A guy does not want to go to the hospital emergency room looking for treatment of hypothermia of the penis.  That would be a little embarrassing.

I thought I was ready for this.  I had some nice running tights that I thought were warm.  I had psyched myself up before going out.  I knew it was going to be cold, but I thought the power of the mind and thoughts of a Caribbean Beach would fight off the cold.  And besides, I was going to be running and burning calories; creating heat! 

To make a long story short, we jogged almost three miles and we all survived (me, my balls and my dick!)  No hypothermia, no frostbite - It was a miracle!
And I learned a valuable lesson: Do Not go Jogging when it is under 40 degrees outside!  I am sorry penis, I will never subject you to that again!

The Best Fails of 2012

Another 2012 Video Compilation.  This time it is 15 minutes of the Best Fails of 2012

Probably Not The Smartest Place to Put an Add for Prostitution




Why would anyone put up an billboard advertising prostitution service across the street from a school?  Oh, Yeah - That's how they do it in Switzerland.

This billboard, which shows a model with a fairly nice ass about to take off her skimpy thong, is advertising an online sex service.  It was placed across the street from a school in  Bruttisellen, Switzerland.

Some of the school administrators took matters into their own hands, ripping off parts of the billboard, much to the dismay of the little boys who walk to school and dads that drop their kids off.

The billboard owners got the point and took the billboard down.

I wish I had that scenery when I was a kid on my way to school!!!

Source

Archie Bunker on Gun Control

30+ years ago and Archie Bunker had the whole Gun Control thing figured out:   End Skyjackings by Arming all the passengers.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Tamara Ecclestone Has Billion Dollar Boobs!

Tamara Ecclestone is a billionaire (well, an heir to a billionaire since her dad owns Formula 1 and everything associated with it).  Her family is richer than the Hilton's and Kardashian's combined and, lucky for us, she likes to show off her body just as much as Paris and Kim!  She doesn't have a sex tape out yet, but I am willing to bet there is one out there and she won't mind it when it comes out. In the meantime, she likes to show off her billionaire fake tits, like these fotos from a Loaded UK Magazine photo shoot.  I am the middle man, passing them on to my loyal readers.  Enjoy!






Ke$ha Just Doesn't Do it for Me

I don't get why so many guys (and girls) think Ke$ha is Hot and Sexy!  Seriously?  I just don't see it.  She has a weird looking face and body, her music sucks and she isn't even a good dancer.  And sometimes I think she is trying to come off that way.  Some kind of "anti-pop star" that somehow made it big.

Take this photoshoot for her latest album.  She is trying to be all sexy and erotic, but it just doesn't happen for me.  She looks more trashy and weird than sexy and hot.  I think I can honestly say that I would not sleep with this chick even if she were lying Naked on my bed begging me for it...   

FUCK!  I guess if she was already naked on my bed I would probably go for it, just to make her feel good about herself, but that is the ONLY reason!  Seriously! 



New Homeland Security Video for Children


How Appropriate!  

New Year's Eve in Mexico City, AKA Chilangolandia

I think it was my second year living in Mexico--I was invited by some friends to go to D.F. (Mexico City for you who are not familiar with the Local Lingo in Mexico) for New Year's Eve.  They promised me it would be the best New Year's Eve I have ever had.  I was skeptical since I have spent New Year's Eve in New Orleans, Las Vegas and Rio de Janiero.  I thought "No Way it will be better than Rio". 

Well, to make a long story short, It wasn't better than Rio.  As a matter of fact it wasn't better than New Year Eve's spent in New Orleans, Vegas, Austin or even Monterrey, but it did trump New Year's Eves spent in Des Moines, Ames and Uvalde, Texas. 

So, in the most old-fashioned Letterman-style countdown, here are the Top Ten Reasons Why Everybody Should Welcome the New Year in Mexico City.

1. You can ice-skate in the middle of the Zócalo. For free.
2. You can buy almost anything in Mexico City, and I mean ANYTHING!
3. There are virtually no illegal Mexicans there (There are Illegal Hondurans, Guatemalans, El Salvadorans, etc)
4. It really is a huge party, much like Mardi Gras
5. You can say “Happy New Year!” a full 2 hours before they do so in California
6. Mexican churches still know how to protect their sanctity
7. You can swear every other minute and no one cares. 
8. Chilangos beat the hell out of the English when it comes to snack foods
9. You can have chilaquiles for breakfast. Everyday. Everywhere
and last, but not least:
10. Street taco makers will do anything to protect your health

¡Feliz Año Nuevo!

My Girlfriend Wants an Electric Toothbrush

So I taped one of her vibrators to her toothbrush and there you have it.  Can't wait to see her reaction and elation at my engineering prowess.

Hottie of the Day - Sunny Leone





Sunny Leone is a Canadian Bollywood star. She is trying to go mainstream Bollywood after having a fairly successful Porn Career here in the states.

Then of course she has to plug her website, which costs $$$ to access (She has to pay the bills somehow!)

 Then she does a little striptease for us in her Apartment (which has a stripper pole in the kitchen - How cool is that?)

 

Sunny, You have deservedly earned a spot as our "Hottie of the Day"

And Don't forget to check out our Other Hotties of the Day!

The Best Pole Dance Ever - Not a Stripper and SFW

Best Table Tennis Shots of 2012

This is especially for Jay and Charlie, who for some weird reason love table tennis videos. This is a compilation of table tennis' best shots of 2012. And as an added bonus, they are set to Xmas music. Enjoy!

Yes, Clearing Snow Off Your Roof Can Be Dangerous!

Just Ask This Guy!

Friday, December 28, 2012

Wiggle That Butt

I may have posted this GIF before, but I don't care.  It is unbelievable!  Good night Everyone and Sweet Dreams...

Reba Buhr as Every Fan's Girlfriend: NBA



Every Fan's Girlfriend: NBA - Starring Reba Buhr.

Changing the Boston Garden from Hockey to Basketball

Cool video of workers changing the Boston Garden over from Hockey to Basketball in a Time Lapse Video.  They do it all in a few hours.  Impressive.

Looks Like Grandpa Liked His Christmas Present


50 Shades of Takei - "Oh Myyy!"

"50 Shades of Gray" read by George Takei

Hottie of the Day - Catie Minx


Catie Minx is a cutie.  She has her own website (Site NSFW) that is filled with NSFW pics.  Catie is a 22 year-old Biology Major who wants to be a nurse (not sure how many places will hire her once they see all the naked pics of her all over the web.)  She is also a self-proclaimed Nerd. Enjoy our Hottie of the Day:




And Don't forget to check out our Other Hotties of the Day!

Free Advice Friday - How to Piss People Off


Found this online years ago.   You can find it in a hundred different places (now a hundred and one).  Not sure who came up with it. I gues it is public domain now.  If you know of the original author, let me know so I can cite them!  

HOW TO PISS PEOPLE OFF

  1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
  2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
  3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
  4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
  5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
  6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
  7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
  8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
  9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
  10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
  11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
  12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
  13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
  14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
  15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
  16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
  17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
  18. Honk and wave to strangers.
  19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
  20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
  21. type only in lowercase.
  22. dont use any punctuation either
  23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
  24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    "DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
    "What?"
    "Never mind, it's gone now."
  25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
  26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
  27. Ask people what gender they are.
  28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
  29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
  30. Sing along at the opera.
  31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
  32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Ever Seen a Truck Full of Cows Tip Over?

I know I haven't.  Luckily, none of the cows were hurt.  No surprise that this happened in Russia, where they seem to have the strangest accidents.

The Boobypack

Creator Christina Conrad has designed the Boobypack.  The Boobypack is: "A top-shelf fannypack...
Coming soon to a rave near you."

Unfortunately, their website is under construction, so I don't understand the whole Boobypack concept.  My guess it is a fanny pack worn as a bra, but the things in their little "Santa Baby" video just look like sports bras.  Go Figure!

Irony? I Think Not...

I know this isn't politically correct, but the kid is wearing it and he is obviously OK with his handicap.  I think more people need to look at life this way.  Way to go Dude!  


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