Saturday, April 28, 2012

Save Our Boobs

Gotta love the "Save Our Boobs" Bus. Anytime that Boobs can be saved, I am all for it.  It appears the bus was in New York City a couple of days ago.  A friend told me he saw it and I decided to google it.  Sure enough, it was cruising the streets of NYC. 

My buddy also said he saw Bree Olson, Charlie Sheen's Porn Star Ex-Girlfriend.  Apparently, she was acting as the spokesperson for the day.  I guess it makes sense, a porn star and boobs go Hand-in-Hand, Pun intended!  

“Porhhub came to me with this idea to do breast cancer awareness,” Olson said. “They figured, you know, breasts are a large part of our industry, and the two would kind of coincide.”

“One thing when we see patients for breast implants, we do a good screening beforehand to make sure they don’t have breast cancer,” Dr. David Shafer, a double-board certified plastic surgeon and diplomat of the American Board of Plastic Surgery said. “We do mammograms, breast exams, and so that’s why we wanted to get involved with this. With a 1 in 8 chance of developing breast cancer in their lifetime, it’s an important issue for all women.” 

Like I said, anything to Save Boobs!  I hope that bus comes to Des Moines soon.  If it does, I promise I will do a live blog from the Bus!  Mark my Words!!!

Happy Birthday to Jessica Alba!

I want to wish a very Happy Birthday to Jessica Alba.  She turns 31 today and is a bona-fide MILF!  

This is NOT the Way to Avoid Paying Your Parking $$$

A driver decides to try and get out of the DFW airport parking lot without paying.  Probably not a good idea!

Movie Reviews by Boss #2 -- The Football Factory

I got this movie because I love Football (Soccer for you dis-illusioned sports fans). It turns out that there is no football footage at all. I don't recall even a single second of football. But it is still a great movie!!
It is a British movie about Hooliganism -- Those soccer fans in England that go around fighting across Europe. It is a very intense film with alot of fighting, cussing and British/Cockney Slang. I like to think of it as "Fight Club" meets "Snatch".

It is an action film that dives into the whole Hooliganism culture that is found throughout England and other parts of Europe. I have a few British Friends and they have told me that this is the most realistic Hooligan movie out there. It really shows what it is like.

This movie centers around the lives of lower middle class English youthwho get caught up in the Hooligan lifestyle to offset their boring and desperate lives. Not only are there youths in the group, but there are also a number of older men that run the group. The two main "old men" have a rivalry as both want to control the group. The fight scenes really seemed to capture the chaos and confusion of that lifestyle. The movie was full of action and it held my attention from start to finish. A good watch for mature folks; the randomness of the violence intermixed with snippets of private life made the movie appear to be very real. I think the realness of the movie is what makes it so good.

I did have some problems understanding the conversation at times. The characters have extreme British accents. Cockney accents I believe. If anyone has ever heard Cockney British spoken, it can be hard to pick up. The slang was out there too. If you do not know British slang, you will be lost at times. Bollocks, Knackered, poxy, "mug me", "smash the granny out of that", are just some of the slang used.

All in all, a great movie. I would give this one 9 out of 10 stars. Get it, rent it, buy it, you should watch this one. I have the movie and have watched it at least 4 times. My wife and I watched it last night. If you don't like violence, you may want to pass.

New Windows Phone 7 Add

This maybe a year and a half old, but it is still one of my favorite adds.  Christina Cuenca is Hot!  I posted this in November of 2010.

For those who still haven't seen the add, or those who just want to see the woman in the Black Lingerie again, here it is:

I have had several friends ask me if I knew who the chick was in the commercial.  Because I am "The Boss", I did know who she is.  Her name is Christina Cuenca.  Miss Cuenca won the title of Miss Louisiana USA 2006 and is a huge New Orleans Saints fan.  A Salute to Christina Cuenca. 

So Close, Yet So Far!

Friday, April 27, 2012

These Sites Should Have Thought of a Different Name

It's Friday!

Even This Lamb is pumped up!

A Great Life Lesson

I had this on my hard drive for sometime now.  I honestly have no idea where it came from, but it is a good little story with a moral.  Enjoy!

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.

“Not very long,” answered the Mexican.

“But then, why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the American.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

The American asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. I have a full life.”

The American interrupted, “I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat.”

“And after that?” asked the Mexican.

“With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise.”

“How long would that take?” asked the Mexican.

“Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years,” replied the American.

“And after that?”

“Afterwards? Well my friend, that’s when it gets really interesting,” answered the American, laughing. “When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!”

“Millions? Really? And after that?” asked the Mexican.

“After that you’ll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends.”

And the moral of this story is: ……… Know where you’re going in life… you may already be there.

21 Year Old Ukranian Girl Has Plastic Surgery to Look Like Barbie

I am not joking!  I couldn't make this shit up!  Click on the link and check it out.  They even have a video.  

Her name is 
Valeria Lukyanova.  I have no idea why this girl would want to do it.  I mean she looked like she could have been pretty hot without all the surgery and stuff. 

Now, she is screwed for life.  She will have to keep getting surgeries, her face is going to become like a stone.  It probably already is tight as hell thanks to the surgery.  WHY???  Why ruin your life to look like Freakin' Barbie!

Free Advice Friday - Short Hair on Women

Told you I would answer reader emails if they were looking for advice.  This email was sent to me Thursday morning from ShortHairedNewGirl.  It is about -- You Guessed It -- Short Hair!  (You all are smart)

So why did I choose this email to answer?  Simple:
    1.  I have short hair
    2.  I am a guy who considers himself somewhat of an expert on women (As much of an expert as a 
         guy can be)
    3.  I have dated a couple of short-haired women in the past.

 So, without further bantering, here is this week's Free Friday Advice (Answering Readers' emails edition)
I just started a new school, and I have been having an ANNOYING problem! See, I am tomboy and have short hair… (long hair annoys me)
Well, EVERYBODY thinks I am a boy!!! (except some new friends)
On top of that there is this girl who is an absolute b… Female dog!!!
Everybody hates her because she thinks she is the boss of the school and throws out horrible comments about the others. I have been called ugly, fat, and that I look like a boy to her! I don’t take it personally… But I am worried that others will! I am kind of the shy girl so I don’t have the courage to tell a teacher…
I need advice on how to look more feminine while still not going 100% girly girl and how I can defend others (and myself) from that one girl!
- ShortHairedNewGirl
Although I am a typical guy and us typical guys generally like longer hair, I have no problem with a hottie that can rock short hair.  I have seen many beautiful short hair women.   I think it also takes a lot of self-confidence to pull off the short hair look.  Congrats to you!  The fact that some girl in your new school is giving you grief over it tells me that you must pull it off with flair.  She has to be jealous or else she would not even have noticed you.  She has to feel that you are a threat to her and she wants the attention to be on her.  
If you LIKE your look, screw everybody else! Seriously, you’re not living your life or dressing yourself for anybody but you. All that matters is that YOU like your look.  Do what you want and stay cool.  
And come back and let me know how you’re doing, okay?

In the meantime, here are a couple more pics of some good-looking girls with short hair.  Enjoy!

So Much for Disneyland Being the "Happiest Place on Earth"

Nothing like going to Disneyland and seeing some Domestic Abuse!!!

Random Observation - Katie Couric: A MILF?

A friend sent me a couple of pics of Katie Couric.  Why?  He has a thing for her.  For some reason, I never found her that attractive.  Maybe because I never watched her shows and I just thought she was old (She is 55 years old).  Anyway, the pics were great and I have to admit, I would classify Katie Couric as a MILF!  Just look at these pics:

Not Bad at All for a 55 year old!  You go Katie!

Thursday, April 26, 2012

The Lottery - Thru a Redneck's Eyes (Who Happens To Be From Iowa)

A redneck wins the lottery and goes to Des Moines to claim his winnings. The man behind the counter verifies the redneck's ticket number and the redneck says: "I want my $20 million. Where is it?"

The man behind the counter replies: "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years."

The redneck says: "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."

Again, the man explains that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years.

The redneck, furious with the man, screams out: "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 million dollars right now, then I want my dollar back!"

Jessica, er... Miss Rabbit, is Flexible!

I follow Jessica Zepeda on twitter.  Many of you know her better as Miss Rabbit, a Houston Texas Model and Video Vixen.  Why do I follow here?  She has some nice tweets! Here's a picture she tweeted out this week for all of her followers to enjoy.  

As you can see, she is very flexible!


This may rank as one of the strangest things I have ever seen!  

The Differrence Between Europeans and Italians

Found this funny little animated flash film by Italian Bruno Bozzetto that illustrates the differences between Europeans and Italians.  Check it out!

The McDonald's Dating Analogy

I don’t know where this came from but I love it.  It appeared in my inbox from someone named Janice.  Thanks Janice, whoever you are!
I know a girl who broke up with a guy and she told him she wanted to “still be friends.” He said, “No thanks.” She wondered why he couldn’t fall back to being just friends after they had a romantic relationship. I came up with the “McDonalds Analogy” to try and explain it in a simple way that would help all women understand this tough question.
Imagine if you went to McDonalds a lot and ordered a Big Mac Combo meal. A Big Mac, Large Fries and a Coke. You really like this meal. One day, you pull up to the drivethrough and order the Big Mac Combo meal and the girl tells you, “I’m sorry – you can have the Big Mac and the Coke, but you can’t get fries with that anymore.” You think about this for a moment, and sure – the Big Mac is the centerpiece of the meal, but McDonalds has some really good fries and you like their fries with your meal. So you say, “I’ve been able to get fries with that before, why can’t I have fries with my Big Mac combo anymore?” The girl says, “Well, I just think it is better if you only have the Big Mac and the Coke from here on out.”
At this point, a lot of guys are going to go to Wendy’s or BK and see if they can get fries with their combo at that drivethrough window. But there are some guys who REALLY like McDonalds Big Macs and they might think, “If I keep coming here and ordering the Big Mac and Coke, maybe she’ll change her mind and give me some fries with that later.” So they will keep on getting the combo without the fries until the deal breaker happens: One day that guy is going to order the Big Mac and Coke and then he’s going to pull up a little bit to pay, and someone else is going to pull up to the drivethrough speaker and order the “Big Mac Combo” and he is going to hear the girl say, “Would you like fries with that?”
That’s why guys don’t like to be friends with a girl who breaks up with them.

Soccer Stare Down

This guy can stare with the best of them!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Girlfriend Caught Cheating Prank

Hilarious Prank!  Although if it were played on me, I think I would still be pissed!!!

31 Legged Race

I thought this was stupid when I first read about it, but it actually is pretty cool.  I believe this happened in Japan and it is pretty amazing.  I am surprised that someone didn't fall and bring them all down.  This would be a great team-building exercise!

America's Got Talent Promotional Video - Go Howard!

I have never watched America's Got Talent before.  EVER!  But I will be watching this year.  WHY?  This man right here!

Howard Stern!  The guy is funny, rude, clever, witty, and everything else.  You never know what is going to come out of his mouth.  I can't wait!

Promo Video Below...

Aquaman is the Cause of Global Warming!

I Can't Eat Toaster Strudel Anymore

I was running late for work this morning so I put a toaster strudel in our little mini-oven.  I never had it before.  While it was heating up I got my stuff together, got my tie on and then grabbed it out of the oven.  This is what it looked like:
As you can see, I put the icing on there and it started to melt.  I walked off for a second came back and saw this.   You may be asking yourself,  "But Semi-Madman, what is so bad about that?"  

My first thought was that someone else was in the house and shot a load on my Toaster Strudel.  That looked like cum drizzled all over it.  If not for my extreme need for food (I hadn't really eaten since noon yesterday) I wouldn't have eaten it.  

By the way - Toaster Strudels are not all that.  I doubt I will be chowing down on them anytime soon.  Especially with that Cum frosting they have!  

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Model Bar Refaeli Plays Tennis -- In Her Underwear!

Not going to say much here.  Just watch the video and:
a.  Ladies - Enjoy watching the sleekness of her "Under Me" line of women's underwear.
b.  Tennis Fans - Watch tennis on this blog (It won't appear often on here)
c.  Guys - Enjoy Watching Bar Refaeli in Underwear!!!

Here's the Video!  You can start sending your "Thank You" emails!

Tanning Bed Prank! -- Hot Blonde is Involved

Hot Blonde Tanning Bed Scare - Watch More Funny Videos

Guys, how many of you were hoping she would take off her clothes before checking out the bed?  Be Honest!!!

The Hottest Bikini in Mexico

I used to Live in Mexico and I saw the Virgin everywhere!  Cars, Truck Tailgates, Hanging from the rearview mirror of Taxis, in restaurants, bars, etc.  She was everywhere.  It only took some time until they came up with a Virgin of Guadalupe Bikini!

Terrifying Tuesdays - Used Tampons and Cereal

This is Disgusting!!!
THOMASTON, Ga. -- An Upson County couple is suing a grocery store chain in federal court, claiming that the husband found a used tampon in his bowl of cereal.
I would have to say that there is nothing worse you could find in your cereal than a used tampon!  I really am at a loss for words.  If I had found it, I would probably have thrown up and then I would begin ranting and raving for about an hour straight.  Then, I would blog about it.  So the end result of me finding it and someone else finding one is the same.  Take that for what it is worth.  It is still disgusting!!!

2014 Olympic Mascots

Found these “cute” mascots for the 2014 Winter Olympics to be held in Russia. They really are kind of cute, but they don't strike me as "Russian" Enough.  I guess since I remember the tale end of the Cold War, I think of the big tough Russians like Ivan Drago from the Movie Rocky. 

My suggestion to the Russian Olympic Federation is to change their mascots.  What about a Mean Polar Bear such as this one:
Or why not just break the norm and have a man as the mascot.  Just have Vladimir Putin be the mascot.  The dude looks tough and he seems pretty cool.  I would buy a "Putin as the Terminator" T-Shirt! 

Comments Please...

I know I don't have a ton of readers, but you people who do check out my blog regularly are very near and dear to my heart!  I thank each and every one of you.

Now, if I could just get some more of you to comment so we can get a dialogue going.  I miss that.  On my old blog, I would regularly get 10 or 15 comments on a post.  Now, I am lucky to get one or two  :(  I am sad.  And I am beginning to feel like Gibby from ICarly:

The only reason I know that is Gibby is because my kids watch ICarly continuously.  They have probably seen every episode 4 or 5 times.  UGH!!!!  I can't stand it...but that is another blog post.  

So please start commenting when you feel like.  I like to comment back.  It may take a day or two, but I will comment, I promise!!!  Have a great week!  

Monday, April 23, 2012

You Have To Do This

I found something incredible the today, and you all need to take advantage. Just follow these steps.

1. Go to Google.
2. type in 2204355
3. click "I'm feeling lucky"

It is hilarious.  You will love it.  Trust me!!!

It Would Suck to Be Named Justin Bieber and Not Be THE JUSTIN BIEBER

If this is indeed real, which several of my friends assure me it is, then this would suck!  To be named Justin Bieber and get harrassed by a bunch of teenagers.  It might be a pedophiles dream come true (and I am sure pedophiles have probably set up fake facebook accounts to lure girls in), but it would suck for a normal adult male.  This guy is a little harsh on Justin, but let's be honest -- The Real Justin Bieber is becoming a stuck-up little brat! 

The last paragraph is hilarious!  I guess he doesn't have any kids.  

As for whether it is fake or not...Who Cares!  It is hilarious and that is all that matter!  

Mariachi Band Playing Michael Jackson's "Beat It"

This is a Mariachi Band in South Carolina called "Mariachi Cabos" doing a great rendition of Michael Jackson's Beat It.

Playboy Energy Drink

This is from last year.  It was on my old blog.  Thought I would repost it because I actually saw a Playboy Energy Drink in a store this week.  First time I saw one, ever!

Playboy has an energy drink coming out.  Yes, that is right...An Energy Drink.  I guess Hugh Hefner's Viagara needs a little extra kick and he has been using some energy concoction and now the Hef is going to market it.  The Hef even had a big Premiere party for the energy drink complete with celebs and bunnies. 

Nicole Scherzinger

Kelly Brook
Playboy Party Girls

Sophie Reade and Friend

My question -- Does the world really need this many energy drinks?  Is there that much of a difference between them all?  And are they even healthy? 

It seemed that just three years ago, there were only like 10 energy drinks to choose from.  I was in a grocery store this week and I counted no less than 39 different brands of energy drinks!  39?  WOW!!  It kind of says something about our society, doesn't it?
Hope Dworaczyk

You Probably Wouldn't Want to Try This in Your Home


Don't Know Why, But This is Hilarious!

I laugh my ass off everytime I see this little comic.  I have no idea why.  Many of my friends think it is stupid.  What do you think?  Funny or Stupid?

This is Just Weird

I don't have anything to say with this one. 

HEY!!  HEY!!!  Quit checking out the girl.  This isn't about the girl.  Quit staring guys!!!

Maybe this will help.  HEY!  Quit looking over there.  Look Right!!!

There you go, no distractions now!  Funny isn't it. 

SHUT UP!  I know you want the girl back but this isn't about the girl!


This is some funny stuff right here! 

GUYS!  Enough about the girl!  This is about the dude and the Manta Ray!!!

OK, OK.  I know you all were staring at the chick and her bikini, so maybe this last frame will help you get the point!!!

Sunday, April 22, 2012

NFL Items that, If Bought, Would Lead to a Divorce

The other night, there was nothing on TV and the wife and kids were out of the house.  I was surfing the net and came upon the NFL’s online store.  MAN!  They have a wide variety of stuff for sale.  Some of it interesting and some of it worthless.   I was looking through the items and saw things that I knew would bring about the wrath and ire of my wife if I were to buy them.  That is why I created this Post. 

NFL Items that, If Bought, Would Lead to a Divorce

I am a huge Dallas Cowboys fan.  I used to live in Texas and I have been to 7 or 8 Cowboys games at the old Texas Stadium.  I have a ton of Cowboy's Memorabilla, but the above 5 foot Dallas Cowboys helmet would probably make my wife (and the neighbors) go crazy.  Imagine that on my front lawn!  It probably wouldn't last long anyway because there is a certain Philadelphia Eagles fan in town that has been known to "Take" my Cowboys items withouth asking.  So it would be gone in a week or so.

This one is worse - the inflatable Patriot. Who would put that thing in their front yard?  The thing looks like it could come to life and terrorize the city! 

Seriously!  Who would be caught dead wearing this?  An ugly jacket with a bunch of patches on it.  Reminds of something from the 70's.  Or maybe the jackets you had in the 80's with all the pins of different pop groups on them.  And why would you want every team?  I am sorry, but I will never wear a jacket that has anything Green Bay or Washington on it! 
Here is a Hat Case.  This one is for the Detroit Lions, but you can get any team on it.  Hat is not included.  I guess if you have a special baseball cap, it is kind of cool.  But the price is what would get me banned from the house.  $109!!!  $109 for a place to put your stupid cap!  Give me a simple little hook for $2 and I will drill it into the wall.
Fatheads!  If any man would start decorating their houses with Fatheads all over the place, I can guarantee you will be getting divorce papers in the mail within a week.  Fatheads are stupid (unless it is a Fathead of yours truly).  I guess I could see kids putting them up in their rooms, but a grown adult decorating the house with them?  Not only is a divorce in the works, but you need to see a shrink. 

Once again, I love the Cowboys but this is taking it a little too far!  A Dallas Cowboys  tree face ornament? I think in addition to getting a divorce, everyone in the neighborhood would probably hunt me down for this one.  Do people actually buy these things?

If you can think of any other tacky, divorce-causing NFL gifts, leave a comment.
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